Rajeev Masand – movies that matter : from bollywood, hollywood and everywhere else

December 10, 2010

Such a drag!

Filed under: Our FIlms — Rajeev @ 11:49 pm

December 10, 2010

Cast: Anil Kapoor, Sanjay Dutt, Akshaye Khanna, Sunil Shetty, Sushmita Sen, Kangana Ranaut

Director: Anees Bazmee

In one particularly tasteless scene in director Anees Bazmee’s No Problem, Akshaye Khanna dressed in drag, is mistaken for a prostitute and picked off the street by Anil Kapoor, who brings him home and begins to grope him on the bed. It’s after Anil has practically climbed on top of him, that Akshaye tells him he has AIDS, a trick that makes Anil back off right away.

In another scene, Paresh Rawal spots Akshaye Khanna with black paint smeared all over his face, prompting him to make a loud declaration that he hates blacks. This incident takes place at a crowded beach in Durban where most of the film is set, and where Paresh’s character is promptly beaten up by the African locals who are understandably offended. One outraged woman even says: “Obama is the President of America, and you still hate blacks?”

No Problem, as you can tell, is a rather ironic title for a film that is offensive on so many levels.

The core plot of this spectacularly stupid film involves a diamond heist gone wrong. Sunil Shetty stars as a nostril-flaring gangster, Sanjay Dutt and Akshaye Khanna play petty thieves, and Anil Kapoor is a police officer who is ticklish because he has two bullets lodged in his stomach. Each of them is in search of these diamonds that have gone missing. Sushmita Sen stars as Anil’s schizophrenic wife who alternates between doting on him, and trying to kill him. Kangana Ranaut is Sushmita’s eccentric, narcissistic sister who falls for Akshaye.

In the tradition of his previous films, Welcome and Singh is Kinng, director Anees Bazmee works with a non-existent script to create humor out of oddball characters and chaotic situations. I didn’t think much of either of those two films, but there were some genuinely comical moments in both. The gags in No Problem, however, fall flat repeatedly because the actors participating in them are in auto-pilot mode, and because the jokes are just not funny.

Your heart sinks when veteran 70s villain Ranjeet appears as a gangster’s henchman with facial hair to rival Teen Wolf. But believe me, you ain’t seen nothing till you’re confronted with the sight of a gorilla letting out a powerful fart in the film’s climax, which sends Anil Kapoor flying to the other end of the room.

I’m going with one out of five for director Anees Bazmee’s No Problem. Move over Housefull, 2010’s most abysmal comedy has arrived!

(This review first aired on CNN-IBN)

14 Comments »

  1. Most abysmal comedy..isn’t that a toss up between this and Dunno Y..na jaane kyunnnnnnnn….???

    Comment by Omar — December 11, 2010 @ 12:02 am

  2. It’s just so sad that a talented Actress like Sushmita who can fairly Act well, Looks Great, and Dance well too chooses such scripts which is not even worth her talent.

    How I hate Good actresses making Bad Career Decisions like – Manisha koirala (Ek Choti Si Love Story and a String of other B-Grade Movies), Madhuri (Ye Raaste Hai Pyar Ke, Hum Tumhare hai Sanam), Karishma Kapoor (Mere Jeevan Saathi and many other such forgettable movies). Why are these talented Actress trying to kill their own career.

    Whereas Bollywood hero’s are concerned they can easily get away with such bad movies but the actresses have to face a tough time.

    Comment by Nikil Shetty — December 11, 2010 @ 12:22 am

  3. mujhe ye movie bilkul samajh me nahe aayi.kabbhi kahe se chimpanzee aa jata hai to kisi ko daura padta hai.isse acchi story to ek 5yr ka baccha likh deta.

    Comment by Abhishek anand — December 11, 2010 @ 12:24 am

  4. Pray that Sonam Kapoor doesn’t read this review of yours…she’s very protective about her dad, kyu logo se negative vibes lena chahte ho sahab….

    Comment by Shaardul — December 11, 2010 @ 12:54 am

  5. BTW you can make your movie reviews on the channel more interesting by highlighting the idiocy or excellence of a movie through a couple of movie clips. Listening to a non-stop rave or rant becomes quite boring at times e.g when you were ridiculing Dunno Y..Na Jaane kyun for its atrocious grammar, you could have shown us the specific scenes.

    Comment by Omar — December 11, 2010 @ 1:01 am

  6. I agree with Omar.

    Comment by Himanshu — December 11, 2010 @ 2:03 am

  7. Worst film
    Of year 2010..

    Comment by Mansoor hafeez — December 11, 2010 @ 2:06 am

  8. Sad to see a man who once gave us stunning films like deewangee,pyaar toh hona hi tha and stories such as mujhse shaadi karogi is now busy squeezing his head in making stupid films…downfall of a talent…

    Comment by akshay sharma — December 11, 2010 @ 8:21 am

  9. I just wonder why i woke up in the morning to see Times of India (Delhi) awarding “3” stars to this movie. Everywhere else i am reading the same reviews what you have given to this movie.

    Its a Dull and Damp ….. POOR

    As Mail today says .. “Its actually not a MOVIE !!” 🙂

    Comment by Manish — December 11, 2010 @ 4:27 pm

  10. what a shit movie but anil kapoor has done a kickass job!but unfortunately the movie did’nt work according to my expectations

    Comment by Aditya — December 11, 2010 @ 4:42 pm

  11. Can’t believe we still have such movies being made and there’s an audience for them..on the other hand Farah Khan promoting “Sheila ki Jawani” as the ‘hottest item number of the year’ – it does not have the finesse of Kajrare (Bunty aur Bubli) and Namak (Omkara)..sad to see that ‘No Problem’ passes of as movies these days

    Comment by Shyam — December 11, 2010 @ 11:53 pm

  12. The worst movie I have ever seen in my life.We can’t say it as a movie at all .It’s even waste to watch this movie in a pirated DVD.It’s not ” No problem ” it’s “All Problem” 4 viewers.

    Comment by Sridhar Sharma — December 12, 2010 @ 7:58 pm

  13. The movie was bad no doubt but I think Rajeev is carrying out a personal agenda against HOUSEFULL because I certainly dont think HOUSEFULL was a bad movie at all………….Rajeev stop comparing it with any other bad movie.

    Comment by Parul Kumar — December 14, 2010 @ 4:28 pm

  14. wtf ..amazingly stupid movie.

    Comment by mallik — December 16, 2010 @ 5:02 am

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